The following article is about the sacrificial schema, its explanation and the solutions for this schema, which are explained based on the schema therapy model. People who have a sacrificial schema are interested in satisfying the needs of others, in a way that they sacrifice their own needs. They do this because they want to prevent the pain and suffering of others, because on the one hand they believe that this is the right thing to do and on the other hand they do not want to feel guilty and selfish. Sacrificialism causes a person to sacrifice themselves for others and therefore endure a lot of suffering. This schema may be confused with the obedience schema, but they have many differences.
People who are overly self-sacrificing may do so for the following reasons:
Attracting attention from others
Fear of rejection from others
Feeling guilty about not meeting the needs of others
Signs of the Sacrifice Schema
If the following are present in your behavior and personality to a large extent, you are inclined towards the sacrificial trap:
I put my own needs after the needs of others, otherwise I feel guilty.
No matter how much work I have, I still quit my job when needed and do other people's work.
People see me as someone who works a lot for others, but does nothing for myself.
It is very difficult for me to ask others to fulfill my needs.
I am only happy when I can make those around me happy and do something for them.
Characteristics of the Self-Sacrifice Schema
When we talk about the self-sacrifice schema, we do not mean that we do not help anyone and are selfish, but rather that we do not push back our needs and feelings and do not put ourselves through the wringer to get the attention of others.
Therefore, the general characteristics of the self-sacrifice trap are as follows:
Extreme focus on the needs of others and neglect of our own needs
Feeling guilty about not being able to do things for others
Feeling angry and upset because others do not compensate for our efforts